Dear best friend where are you?

Dear best friend where are you!?

Hi there where are you? it's been hell since January, I lost my grandmother...I've been sick since late February and it isn't going away no matter what I do...I'm stressing out over my heart problem that may have gotten worst and I'm waiting on results..
I need you man...where are you buddy? 
I have guy problems and I just need you :( 
Yes I'm aware this is personal but I need my bestie back I'm going through hell where are you? I need one of your hugs...